Ah! Megami-Sama was created by Fujishima Kosuke, and while I might wish I owned the series, I don’t.

I wouldn’t mind owning Negima, either, but I don’t. It belongs to Akamitsu Ken.

Exchange Student

Lesson Six: Physical Education

The inner sanctum of the vampire Evangeline was almost as unexpected, and in much the same way, as the vampire herself. Bright, airy, and filled with comfortable pillows and rich tapestries. The only discordant note was the small doll, sitting on a bench and cheerfully sharpening a knife.

"Chachazero. Get out."

The doll looked up, its manic grin completely unabated. "Can’t I watch? I like seeing wounds and blood."

"Get out, now."

The doll hopped to her feet and stalked out of the room, dragging its knife behind it. Evangeline closed the door behind it.

"Now, then, girl," said Evangeline. "Take off your jacket."

Skuld slowly started to unbutton the jacket. "You could have asked more nicely."

"I do not have time for the niceties of societal interaction," snapped Evangeline. "Aside from that, you have accepted my conditions, and if you will recall, the first of those is that my word is law. Manners do not count where students are involved. The shirt, too."

"But--"

"You are starting out as a very poor student," said Evangeline. "Must I repeat myself?"

Skuld unbuttoned her shirt, and removed it. Beneath, she wore a silk chemise. "Should I remove this as well?"

"Did I ask you to?" Evangeline pointed at a cushion. "Sit there."

Skuld sat where directed. "And now what?"

"Give me your hand."

Skuld reached out to the vampire, and Evangeline seized her wrist.

"Most people expect the bite of a vampire to be at the neck, but in fact, any place that there is an artery near the surface will do." She stroked the taller girl’s arm. "Some are more convenient than others. The neck is good when a victim struggles, but if the subject is willing, the wrist is much easier."

Skuld looked away, then winced as she felt the vampire’s fangs prick her wrist.

"Hardly any pain, is there," chuckled Evangeline. Then she felt the girl’s lips at the wound, felt the pressure as she sucked the blood from her veins--

Then was hurled away from the vampire. She turned, and gasped in surprise.

Evangeline’s skin was glowing, and she floated an inch above the floor. Her head was thrown back, her mouth open, a trickle of blood still flowing from her mouth. Skuld looked down at her arm, realized that she was still bleeding. She grabbed a cushion, used it to try to stem the flow of blood.

A crackling noise drew her attention back to the vampire. Arcs of magical energy rippled along the girl’s skin, and a long, drawn-out cry escaped her.

Then the light faded, and Evangeline collapsed bonelessly to the floor. Slowly, she sat up, and stared at Skuld.

"What the hell are you?"

"A Goddess," Skuld answered.

"I believe it," said Evangeline. She stood up weakly, and shook her head. "Your blood is incredibly potent; I haven’t had that kind of rush ever." She glanced down at Skuld’s wrist. "You’re still bleeding."

"You should know," growled Skuld. "You bit me!"

"Give me your arm again."

"Didn’t you get enough--"

"Give me your arm, girl!" snapped Evangeline, and Skuld held it out almost by reflex. Evangeline grabbed her wrist again, and licked the two puncture wounds. Then shuddered. "Oh, so rich! The saliva of a vampire can close wounds."

Skuld looked down, and saw that the punctures had closed. As she watched, they faded, becoming mere scars, then vanished entirely.

"You should have warned me," admonished Evangeline.

"How could I have known--"

"How could you not know that you’re a Goddess? That is what you should have told me!"

"I don’t exactly advertise it," snapped Skuld.

"Your blood is supercharged with the same energies found in the World-Tree." Evangeline frowned. "Are you by chance a Norn?"

"Goddess of the future," confirmed Skuld.

Evangeline opened her mouth to say more, but paused. A faint bell tolled in the distance, and she smiled.

"Looks like your sparring partner has arrived," she said. "Chachamaru."

The bedchamber doors opened, and the gynoid stepped in. "Yes, Mistress."

"Fetch orange juice for the Norn here. Then when she is ready to show herself to the world again, bring her to the atrium."

- - - - -

Her sparring partner turned out to be Asuna.

"Negi-boy has built up quite a little harem," said Evangeline. "Asuna, here, was his first pick."

"We’re not a harem," grumbled Asuna.

"Half of the girls are being trained in magic," continued Evangeline. "The other half are chosen for skills that they already possess. Asuna is a bit of both."

"Negi isn’t training me in magic," said Asuna. "Takamichi taught me all the magic I know."

"And it’s hardly any," said Evangeline. "But what Negi is teaching you is how to use what magical talents you do have to good effect on the field of combat. Thus enabling you to serve both as a combatant and as a magical adept."

"What has this got to do with me?" asked Skuld.

"Negi and company have already dealt with some formidable opponents," said Evangeline. "Wilhelm, Chigusa, Chao..." She smirked. "Me. We have to find out if you’re up to having him as your teacher. After all, it can be hazardous to your health."

"But why Asuna?" Skuld shook her head. "Why do I have to fight her?"

"Because her Artifact is specifically designed to be able to counter your advantages," said Evangeline. "All the other tests I have, you could overcome too easily. It is only when pushed to your limits that you will reveal your true mettle."

"So to prove myself a worthy student, I have to fight Asuna?"

"You just don’t listen, do you?" Evangeline shook her head. "You’ve already paid the price to be his student. Now, we’ll find out what sort of student you’ll be." She indicated the redheaded girl. "Sixty seconds. If I can’t tell what sort of person you are after sixty seconds of combat with Asuna, then I’ll bow out, and let Negi train you as he sees fit."

"All right." Skuld raised her fists, and turned to Asuna. "I’m ready when you are."

"You sure about that?" Asuna raised her hand, her Pactio card held between the first two fingers. "Adeat!" The harisen appeared in a flash of light.

"Begin," said Evangeline.

Asuna charged forward, and Skuld raised her hands. She began chanting the only spell she could think of that could help in this matter: the spell of levitation. "Bonds of Earth—"

She got the first two words out before the harisen smacked into her forehead, and the world went black.

- - - - -

Light filtered in slowly, and Skuld winced.

"Did I fail?"

"This was not a pass or fail situation." The vampire’s voice came from somewhere to her left, but she could see nothing but a white blur, thanks the the cloth over her eyes. "It was a test to see what needs to be improved, and where you will best serve Negi."

"Certainly not as a front-line fighter."

"True," said Evangeline. "You react with the instincts of a spellcaster."

Skuld pulled the cloth off her face. "I’m here to learn magic, so why do you say that in such a sarcastic tone?"

"You were not engaged in a magical duel, but in a physical duel," said Evangeline. "When a maniac is charging you with a weapon, you should not stop to throw a spell. Especially when they’re as close as Asuna was."

"So what should I have done?"

"Evade, run away, then worry about a spell. You’re not very quick on your feet, either, girl."

"Do you have anything nice to say about me?"

Evangeline nodded. "You’re focused."

"So?"

"So we can use that focus to shape your training," she said. "Negi-boy?"

Negi looked up. "Yes, Master?"

"She’ll need physical training. Concentrate on blocks, parries and breaks. Once she can go toe-to-toe with...let’s say, Setsuna, for sixty seconds without being hit, we’ll discuss her magical training."

"Who’s Setsuna?" Skuld recalled hearing the name before, but she didn’t think she’d met her yet.

"Our resident swordswoman," said Negi.

"Sword--you’re gonna put me up against a sword, when a stupid fan was enough to knock me out?"

"When sparring, Setsuna uses a push-broom," said Asuna. "And she’s good, probably better than me."

Skuld sat up slowly - the room was still spinning somewhat - and looked over in Negi’s direction. "I’m supposed to be learning magic, not how to fight! If I wanted to learn how to fight, I’d join the Valkyries!"

"With a combination of martial arts and magic," said Negi, "you could join the Valkyries, and take Brunnhild’s title from her."

"Brunnhild doesn’t lead the Valkyries anymore," said Skuld. "Not since she got married. Lind has that job now."

- - - - -

Asuna had neither the training nor the temperament to be a martial arts instructor. However, Negi had both, and Asuna still made a very tough sparring partner.

Skuld collapsed bonelessly into her futon. "This sucks."

"I think you did quite well, for a beginner." Negi unrolled his sleeping bag on the futon - while he was cheerfully assimilating himself into Japanese society in many ways, in this way, he was still quite British.

"And why exactly are you sleeping in here?"

"The gate won’t let him out for another twelve hours," said Asuna. "No more than it would let us out."

"I mean, with him in here with us?"

"Oh," chuckled Asuna. "I see your problem. Did you forget that he’s only ten?"

"That’s beside the point," snapped Skuld. "Surely in this giant place, there’s a bedroom suitable for him? I don’t mind sharing a dorm with him - not too much, anyway - but this is just too much!"

"Calm down," said Asuna. "In the first place, he’s not going to molest you. In the second, I’ll pound him if he does. Got it, Sensei?"

"Loud and clear," said Negi.

"I’m not sleepy right now anyway," said Skuld crossly. "Just sore and tired - you had me practice that one counter-move for over four hours!"

"So you should be able to do it in your sleep," said Negi.

"Except that I’m not going to be sleeping!" She was starting to get a bit louder now. "Didn’t my sister tell you about that?"

"She did," admitted Negi. "But--"

"Her sister. As in another Goddess?"

"She’s a Norn, Asuna. They come in threes." Negi turned back to Skuld. "What do you normally do while Belldandy and Keiichi sleep?"

"I work on my inventions!"

"Evangeline might have a robotics lab here," said Negi. "After all, she had a hand in the creation of Chachamaru and Chachazero."

"Maybe I’ll look around for it," said Skuld.

- - - - -

"What are you doing in here?"

Skuld blinked, and turned to face the miniature Vampire.

"Oh. Ummm..."

Evangeline smirked. "I see. You’re looking for parts to scrounge, aren’t you?" She pointed a finger towards the door. "Out."

Skuld sighed. "Fine." She stomped out of the lab. Evangeline followed her out, securing the door behind her.

"You know, girl, I can’t quite figure you out."

"What do you mean?"

"I’ve done everything in my power to discourage you--"

"Wait. You mean taking my blood, putting me up against Asuna, and then making me go through that gruelling session with Negi were to try to get rid of me?"

"Of course," said Evangeline. "What’s the point in accepting any idiot that comes along?"

Skuld ground her teeth. "And here I thought that you were actually testing me. Actually training me. And you’re playing me for an idiot?"

"You are an idiot, girl." Evangeline took a step forward. "I’m not interested in training the half-willed, or the half-witted, or the incompetent, or weaklings. I’m looking for the cut above. I had to be sure that you had it."

"And you’re convinced now?"

"No," said Evangeline. "You’re hopeless."

"What?"

"You should stop fooling around here, and go home and play with your dolls." Evangeline waved a hand in dismissal. "I can’t teach you. You’re too stubbornly insistent on not learning."

"You little—" Skuld stepped forward, calling her hammer into existence. "I came here to learn. Maybe I don’t think I need to, but my sister expects me to learn, and I will not disappoint her again."

"Not a good enough reason!" Evangeline did not back off as Skuld approached. "Halfway measures will get you killed against the sort of foes that Negi deals with. And if you train with him, it is certain that you will find yourself battling such foes. Fate Averruncus is still out there. He was easily the most dangerous foe that Negi faced, and he was not properly defeated. He will—"

"Wait. Who?"

Evangeline paused. "You know the name of Averruncus?"

"Yes," said Skuld. "He—" Her voice fell silent, then she said, "I cannot speak of him. Cannot even say why."

"You will tell me about him," said Evangeline. She stepped forward again. "I command it."

"I cannot!"

"Girl, you swore to obey me in all ways," said Evangeline. "My word is law. Do you disobey me now?"

"I cannot tell you!" Skuld shook her head vehemently. "Not will not, but physically cannot! I—" Again her voice fell silent.

"You will tell me, girl, or so help me, I will visit the pain of a thousand demons on you." Evangeline raised her hand. "Lic lac la lillac—"

"Come forth, Noble Scarlet!" The Angel burst into being above Skuld, instinctively raising a barrier shield, and Skuld stepped forward, swinging her Debugging hammer. It slammed into Evangeline’s own barrier, disrupting it, but also being deflected.

Evangeline stepped back, surprised. "I see that you can at least bring down a barrier. And your Angel seems to have her own magic, and that better than your own. Chachamaru."

"Mistress." The gynoid stepped from the shadows.

"I will need your assistance with this one."

Skuld glared at the robot. "I thought you said we could be friends," she spat.

"I would be happy to be friends, but Mistress commands me." Chachamaru charged forward, and Skuld reacted by instinct.

Her left hand released its hold on the hammer, and grabbed Chachamaru’s wrist as the gynoid attempted a punch. She drew the robot further along her path, then swept her arm down and back. Chachamaru described a perfect circle in the air, and slammed into the marble floor, face first.

But Skuld was still moving. Her left hand returned to the hammer, and she spun. The feint looked like a high swing to the right, but changed at the last moment, and became a vicious rising snap from the left. The hammer’s head caught Evangeline’s chin, snapping her head back and pitching her into the air. Skuld completed the spin, bringing the hammer high overhead and smashing the Vampire into the ground.

She stepped back, and blinked. The entire manoeuvre had taken about a half a second.

"Holy—did I do that?"

"Seems we found something that will rile you up, didn’t we, girl?" Evangeline sat up slowly, and wiped blood from her chin. "Enough to bring your Jotun blood to the foreground, anyway."

"How—"

"Now can you apply that anger to the task at hand, little girl?" Evangeline stood up. "You know something about Fate. Something important. Something that you cannot tell me about."

Skuld did not answer.

"Negi and his harem will have to deal with Fate in the future. Will you be there?"

"I will be," snarled Skuld. "If you are certain that he will appear, I will be there to thwart him."

"Then," said Evangeline, "we had best make sure that your training is properly attended to."